Patterns

9/09/2012


Dress: Viereck via Stitchfix
Bag: Coach
Sunglasses: Gucci
Earrings: Bauble Bar
Belt: ASOS
Shoes: Isaac Mizrahi
Mascara: Cover Girl Lash Blast





I have been really successful for the last three weeks in getting processed foods out of my diet and in working out at least five days per week.  I've mentioned my weakness for 21 Choices yogurt, which I banished from entering my mouth two weeks ago and before that, my last order was for non-fat peach with raspberries mixed in.  Except for the sugar, I'm still trying to feel positive that my choice was a better one than the usual Caramel Churro or Red Velvet Cookie Dough.  Being good for three weeks had made me consider the other things I should do for my diet, break them into baby steps and try to stagger them to start seeing better results.

Some aspects of working out are getting easier, but overall, it has been a real bear to get moving again.  I always played competitive sports when I was a student.  I had practice of some sort or another every day for years.  After I stopped playing sports, I worked out religiously up until A was born 13 years ago.  After becoming a mother while working a more than full-time job, I felt something had to give, and that something for me was the time to take care of myself.  The years of physicality were good to me, and even when I put on weight, I could easily take it off by watching my calorie intake.  I remained flexible and I didn't really recognize any decrease in my overall strength.  Then three years ago, I developed a deep vein thrombosis in my left leg from the groin to the mid-shin after a routine medical procedure.  I couldn't walk for a while, and the doctors weren't sure I'd ever walk without a limp.  I knew I had too many pairs of heels to not get over this thing, and I did, but running which was something I had always enjoyed doing, seemed out of the question with my new decreased range of motion.  I stopped trying to exert myself using the leg injury as an excuse.  I knew that I was losing my flexibility and my strength in other parts of my body because they weren't being challenged.  I had always prided myself on having thin, muscular arms that didn't wobble when I waved at someone.  Suddenly, I saw the wobble appearing.  And more than that, decreasing calories was not enough to lose the weight anymore.

When we bought our treadmill in March, it was an even bigger wake-up call.  I couldn't run on the treadmill at all, and it had nothing to do with my left leg.  I had no stamina, and I had no balance.  It was almost as though I couldn't walk a straight line.  I had to hold on to the sides to stay on the treadmill.  I started noticing that even while wearing flats, I had a balance problem that was probably a lasting after-effect of the DVT.  I've started doing Pilates, ballet-based workouts and yoga, and my balance and the strength in my leg are returning, but I really don't know what normal will be.

Now that I've increased the frequency and variety of my workouts, I've listed the continuing baby steps I'd like to take with my diet.  The first one which goes into play tomorrow is to not eat anything white.  I have been eating only whole grain bread or brown rice, but at least once a week, I will slip up and not be prepared, so I'll eat a piece of sourdough bread or white rice at sushi.  This one will be hard.  After I successfully adapt to that one, I have to cut down on dairy.  I don't drink milk, but I have heavy cream in my coffee.  I've already cut myself down to one cup of coffee a day which was huge, but I'm still pouring in the cream.  Also, I'm a total cheese addict especially when I'm trying to eat less grains.

Why the renewed commitment?  I've been good for three weeks, and even though I didn't see any great movement on the scale or in how my clothes are fitting, I felt better.  I haven't been having nearly as many headaches.  Whenever I eat sugar or have too much bread or potatoes, I have an almost hung-over feeling.  It was so nice to not feel that way when going to sleep at night or waking up in the morning.  And right now, I'm full of that feeling.  I had a totally over-indulgent weekend with two family celebrations.  I ended the binge with a huge piece of cake, and I'm currently aching and fuzzy.  Yuck.  The moment on the lips isn't worth the aftereffects that I'm sure will follow me into tomorrow.  I'll let you know how it's going as I keep taking my baby steps.

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